Two Things That Annoy Me.

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Good Morning!

There are few things that annoy me in this world, the word ‘disease’ being one of them, many doctors and health advisors described my mums MS as a disease. Like a pest that she contracted from a Rat or Vulture, what they don’t understand is that my mother would grow to live with MS, it would become a part of her, her daily schedule a part of who she is. I didn’t like the suggestion that my hero would become a disease, like it would get so bad that she would lose herself amongst an illness! I knew my mother every day of my life and she was not one to be taken over or dominated by someone or something. She has her ways of doing things and she would learn how to adapt, and after everything she would own the MS.

Another being, pity, I was young but, I knew well that there was always going to be someone worse off, someone suffering from poverty or famine; I despised people’s pity. Pity felt cold , I knew they meant well, all of them, desperately trying to sympathise with me and my ‘situation’. – I’m not ungrateful – I am grateful, but at that moment in time I couldn’t have felt more different in the world. I felt as though, I should stroll around with ‘ I’m a young carer’ embellished on my forehead.

* * * *

Months dragged on, steering closer to the day every child was ecstatic for : Christmas. We were managing, doctors prescribed, tested and evaluated the medication my mum was receiving, she regularly attended appointments at hospitals, the sickly sterile smell became familiar and the cold embrace of the Hospital gown, loosely wrapped around her body; was her only reassurance when the MRI machine consumed her. She was stable … We thought she was stable anyway, maybe I thought that it would all get better, like tonsillitis or the flu. In a way it did, it became the norm, our daily lives moulded around it to fit tightly, like a plaster cast on a broken arm, we were close.

My brothers coped better than me, they seemed so strong and boyish, whereas I realised they were as torn as I was, they just dealt with it differently. Alex being only twenty two months older and Tom six years older than myself, it baffled me.
I was naive, thinking that the MS would never change. That Christmas as we tried to celebrate, my mum ebbed and rolled in pain upstairs ; she was relapsing, meaning it was getting worse. We ended up phoning a paramedic and they delivered her a drug: morphine, more doctors and MRI’s, injections and more MS. We took dose after dose of bad luck, convinced one day someone would say ‘right there’s your lot, now get on with it.’ …

Right that’s all. I do love a good cliffhanger. I would just like to thank you all for the amazing support you have all given me. Please feel free to leave a comment, like or share. Have a lovely day!

All my love,

The Odd Pigeon xx

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4 thoughts on “Two Things That Annoy Me.

  1. I was a young carer for my mum with MS. Had no support whatsoever and pretty much all she had was me. The comment about ‘pity’ couldn’t agree more. I would have ‘those’ looks from people and they would talk to me about her in front of her. Maybe this is what has driven me to work in Health and social care for 20 years. My mum was not an easy lady to live with while she was alive but I now understand that she had her ways of getting through the days.

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    1. Hello Kate,

      Lovely to hear from you!
      It’s comforting to know that someone feels the same way! Thank you for reading my blog, I really hope you are enjoying it. I really relate to the ‘looks’ you mentioned. It’s great to hear about your career, I did look into health and social care, although I’m a bit squeamish with sick. 😷 I find mum is often quite stubborn, we tell her to rest and 99% of the time she ignores us. Thank you for you touching comment!!

      All my love ,
      The odd pigeon xx

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  2. Wishing you every success with your blog Livvy, you have been and still are an amazing help to your Mum and brothers.
    I am sure that this blog will help with the isolation and despair felt by so many young carers.
    I am just so incredibly proud of you. xxx

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